Dan and I went out for dinner on our anniversary. 13 years - wow! I have to say there was a time I wasn't sure if we were going to make it, destine to become a statistic. But seeing where we are now I'm so proud of the partnership we have. Are there days that I'd love to strangle him? Well sure. We are far from perfect, but we compliment each other well. I couldn't see sharing this life with anyone else. We've grown together in many things. With everything that life has thrown our way we've managed to stay afloat and become stronger. I'm sure that life isn't going to be chocolates and rose petals but whatever comes our way we'll take it on together. Here's to many more years as husband and wife.
Once again MS has shown it's ugly true colors. I found both of my legs n feet completely numb to the touch, but inside it felt as if I was standing in a bucket of ICE cold water. That it's so cold it burns and aches feeling. Irritating to say the least, but thankfully I never lost function I have to pay more attention when I walk as I found myself tripping more due to the fact of me not knowing where my feet are. The numbness moved up to my hips so my bum and such where numb also, which is One of the strangest feelings when using the bathroom :(. I went in for 5 days of IV steroid infusions, but I have as of yet to be back to my normal. The numbness is from my knee caps down now so there has been some improvement but I was hoping for more. I'm sure the stresses of worry for my mom's lastest health scare and then the family drama that went with it was a driving factor in this relapse. I go back for a MRI in November and I'll be interested to see if there are any new lesions showing up or just old ones still causing havoc. I guess time will tell. Makes me wonder if the Copaxone injections are doing their part fighting against MS. Sigh!
It's so disappointing that I can NOT control this....I have always been able to handle stress (so I thought), but now I handle stress and my body says FUCK YOU. We don't play well :( and I'm utterly disappointed. Someone tell me how to handle this? I can put a smile on my face, say everything is ok, and go on without "Letting" stress bother me...but obviously internally the stress is just destroying me. PISSED OFF is what I am, this is NOT what I'm used to....I want to be wired differently. It amazes me how something so ...... mental (mind over matter) really can take hold and break ones body done behind the scenes. The fact that I can no longer "hide" is personally killing me. I'm always the strong one, I've always been ok, I can overcome and have overcome many obstacles that my life has thrown at me. So screw off MS and LEAVE ME ALONE!!
On the 18th I turned 40. I was first very reluctant to be "climbing that mountain, as Dan puts it", but seeing I've seen enough MS crap in my 30's I'm ready for a newer fresher beginning. Here's to a healthier 40's then my 30's. Bring it on!! Seeing I'm still IN a relapse I found myself feeling off and having a higher BP on my birthday. So I relaxed most of the day and took it easy. Dan had 40 gorgeous roses waiting on the table in the kitchen when I woke up and informed me we had dinner plans that evening. With Dan's 39 birthday just 2 days after mine and our schedule was looking full our bday dinners would be on my bday, cool. Av was very excited to come home from school that day to find her new phone came in the mail so before dinner I took her to get everything activated and switched over. She was in the land of giddy with her new phone in tow, plus she had the instructions as to where dinner was going to be. Dinner was at surprise location, The Melting Pot. I hadn't been there in years. Dan met us there seeing we were in town for Av's phone already. Dinner Surprise number 2 came once I walked around the corner and found my mom, Aunt Bonnie, Gail, and even Danny (n Aleana) there. What a sassy boy as I just said good bye to him and he made no clue he was going out for dinner too. Before dinner started surprise number 3 was presented.........a 2.5 day - 3 nite trip to Vegas!!! I saw this HUGE sigh of relief come from Dan once the cat was out of the bag. I guess it was weighing in him as he's been trying to plan this since Spring. We've always talked about wanting to go and now it's becoming a reality. The nursing schedule was already taken care of, my schedule was cleared, and the trip Is booked so all I needed to do is pack. Easier said then done with Ms planner here! I've spent the last 5 days with my head spinning. What to bring, where's Av going, and what to do while in Vegas. Anxiety is high as I've never been away from Danny this long and again my legs n feet are still numb (Dan says he'll rent a scooter for me if we have too, lol). I decided to play it by ear and not book any shows or anything before we get there and just see what Vegas has to offer. Once there I'm sure we'll find things to do. I've never had anything like this done for me before so I was alil stunned and emotional even. It's not very often that I find myself speechless. I'm always the one giving and trying to one up people, shocked I tell ya. Watch out Vegas here we come!!
Danny bday present he made me
Receiving my "gift" ~ ironically the old house we just bought had an old poster of the Vegas strip. So Dan rolled up the itinerary in there :)
Melting Pot is a Fondue style restaurant
and the wonderful dipping choices
My ideas for Dan's 39th bday were now small and insignificant. Which just gives Dan more pleasure knowing he "Got Me". I made reservations at his favorite restaurant, got him some comfy hunting attire along with the box set of one of his favorite shows. Dan spend the morning at a scheduled house burn so he was in all his glory doing what he loves to do, fighting fire. I brought some cake to the fire station for when the guys n gal got back they could have alil something special. When we got home from dinner we put an oldie favorite movie of Dans in and relaxed. It was nice to just hang out.
I thought it was neat the trucks are #39
It was a great reality check for Av and myself included. This 1.5 story house was down to just the chimney 20 minutes after it was lite on fire. Scary!!
Danny's bday gift he made his dad.......isn't a wonderful artist!?!
My first baby, Bailey turned 14 on the 21st. That makes her 98 in dog years. I'm constantly reminded of goldens life expectancy (12) when we go to the vets. But for 14 she is looking good, old but good. Despite having Lymes and a seizure 2 yrs ago she's healthy. She's giving us a few scares here n there, but she bounces back like a champ. Love you Miss B!!
We had our family photos done on Monday. This year we chose to try something different and go on location to have them done. Danny was in rare form, but I think the photographer managed to get some good shots of him. We did them on a Railroad track with the beautiful fall colors. I have to say I don't think we'll be taking Danny over a RR track bridge ever again....the fear factor of if a train was going to come was definitely in the back of my mind. It was no easy feat to get him ON the tracks ACROSS a bridge so if a train happened upon us, we would have been SCREWED!! We did a bunch of different poses then we have in the past and I can't wait to see how they turned out.
Stay tuned!!
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